Last night it snowed 1/2-1″ at my house. However, today it’s fairly sunny. The sidewalks are clean and clear, as is the road. But my driveway has some snow on it.
This afternoon around 11:30 AM I hear a loud, ‘there’s a fire!’-like knock at the door. Immediately following the knock, a solid doorbell ring. There stands an old lady around 5 feet tall, wearing a thin blue jacket. She also had thin, somewhat scraggly hair and didn’t have the best of apperances.
Here’s how the conversation went:
Me:”Can I help you?”
Lori:”Hi My names Lori” (Extends hand)
Me:”Hi Lori what can I do for you?” (hesistantly shakes hand)
Lori:”I’m trying to earn some money I was wondering if I could shovel your drive way, and you can decide what it’s worth”
At this point, I’ll admit here on the blog that I went into standard solictor reactionary mode. I wasn’t thinking. My immediate response:
Me:“I’m sorry, not today”
Lori:”Okay thanks” (As she turns away and takes off)
What the crap… “I’m sorry, not today?”. What, like come back another day? I have no idea what I was thinking. It was like my instinct to kick people to the curb just took over and I essentially didn’t even hear what the lady said.
To be fair, I don’t think I had any cash anyway. I called my wife 10 minutes after just to tell her about it, and she told me we might have had a few dollars slipped away somewhere in a random place or two. I didn’t know that at the time, but I’ll be honest and say I wasn’t thinking about that when I told her to beat it.Also, as far as I could tell, there was no shovel. Now I could be wrong, maybe she put it up against my garage, or maybe she intended on asking me to get one for her. Who knows.
Regardless, I feel crappy about it. I wouldn’t have felt right having an old lady shovel my driveway. Maybe I should’ve just given her some dough? Is this just a new scam? Instead of “will work for food”, refusing to work if you actually offer work? Or did I totally blow it? I feel like I kinda blew it.
What would you have done? Am I the worst person ever?
Comments definitely welcome.
I don’t think you’re out of the ordinary, at all. I find myself responding the same way. Where I live, it’s common to have some guy run up with a jagged squeegee and a soda bottle of muddy water, and start cleaning your windshield. Even if my windshield is filthy, I find myself resenting it, and send ‘em packin’! If they walk up and ask, I’ll usually respond more kindly, but still don’t often take them up on it.
I have always resented unsolicited sales efforts. I consider it to be the same as SPAM, but in person.
lets have a hot drink ready for her.
@zorro
but they might come again maybe for more food?
What would you have done?
- “where´s the fire?” instead “can I help You”
- (hesistantly shakes hand)??? means “You are welcome”. I never shake hands in doubt.
- “I wasn’t thinking.” and “immediate response” Think before speek!
I once surprised a man in a similar situation:
- “Take this returnable bottles and don´t come again” So less work for me and an anouncement for him. (go away, collect bottles and don´t disturb my privacy again)
@zorro
“next time just offer something to eat…{but don’t offer any money}” Yess!
next time just offer something to eat…{but don’t offer any money}
[...] RE:Am I a horrible person for telling this lady to take a hike? [...]
No, you aren’t a horrible person. That post about Flash cookies a few months back bought you plenty of good social karma. The woman made an attempt to sell you something, and you declined. If you can’t get over the guilt of rejecting a sales pitch, you will quickly be buried in stuff you don’t need and can’t afford. Declining a purchase should not be confused with a desire to help the needy. Every homeless shelter I know of continuously recruits volunteers. Perhaps all of us should spend a little time volunteering for some sort of poverty relief, just so we have enough knowledge of charitable resources to have an appropriate response to personal requests from poor individuals.
I most likely would have done the same thing.
This is going to sound really dumb, but people that are looking for money/help/work/anything need to learn a couple key points:
1) When you surprise someone, you will get their default response 99% of the time or more. In this world of overly cautious citizens, you have to approach things in a way that will give people time to knw that your legit.
2) There are many kind/good-hearted people in this world, but you have to know where to find them. Scary alleys & hurried businesses aren’t the wisest choices. The beach is pretty good, but people worry about the safety of their kids. I personally recommend outside of a gymn. People just worked out, showered, changed clothes (they’ve slowed down), and are about to leisurly go home and relax. They’ve slowed enough to think about it and not just “default.” Another good spot is outside a church BEFORE it starts (A- people want to look good at church, B- who isn’t willing to postpone church by 3 minutes?)
I’m not reprieving myself (or anyone else) of the responsibility to help others- but I am saying that I am much more likely to help people if they catch me at the right moment (when I have time to think, and not afraid of the safety of my family, and can tell that the person is legit).